Posts tagged things I miss

Oh, what a night!

This weekend Scott and I celebrated our FIVE YEAR wedding anniversary.  Which, if you remember correctly, was July 3rd.  Since 4th of July weekend is always a busy, busy time, we decided to postpone our festivities a week.  If you live in the Northeast region of the US, you are probably aware that we were in a heat wave/dry spell for over a week.  The sun shone down each and every day and it was hot and humid outside.  Well, wouldn’t you figure that the day we picked to head into the city to celebrate five glorious years of wedded bliss would be the day that the dry spell ended.  I’m not talking a little bit of rain here either, people.  I’m talking about torrential down pours and flash floods.

We had to avoid this on our way in to the city:

And by avoid I mean we had to jump a curb, drive over some grass, and pretty much drive the wrong way down a one way street to get to a flood free road.  (For any of you locals reading, this is Storrow Drive and we had to cut over to Beacon St.)  It might not sound like the safest idea but everyone was doing it so we followed suit.  Thank God we did otherwise we would have been sitting in that traffic backup for nearly 3 hours.

Once we found our way to the hotel the sun looked like it was peeking through the clouds.  I was relieved because we had planned to have dinner in the North End and then walk around a bit.  We pulled up and handed the keys over to the valet, to which Scott joked, “Have fun!” and I nearly puked at the $42/night parking rate.  Upon checking in to the hotel, Scott mentioned to the front desk girl that we were in celebrating our 5 year anniversary (this will be important later).  We got our room key and headed toward the elevator to our king sized bed, Fenway view room on the 5th floor.  Heaven!

After dropping our stuff in the room, we made a reservation for dinner, which wasn’t until 8:30pm and then headed out to take in the city and stop for a snack to hold us over until dinner.  We were gone an hour tops.  When we returned to our room we saw this:

That’s right kids, the receptionist sent a bottle of champagne and chocolates up to our room for us! How’s that for service!  It took the sting off the valet parking charge.

After downing the bottle of champagne and pretty-ing ourselves up, we hopped on the T and headed to the North End.  By this point, the rain had totally stopped and it turned into a pretty nice evening.  We walked through Faneuil Hall and down Hanover Street before making our way in to Strega for our 8:30 reservation.  As we watched Italian Mafia movies we dined on stuffed portabella caps, lobster ravioli and shrimp and scallop fettuccine.  We were beyond full.  However we couldn’t call it a night without stopping into Caffe Vittoria for a sweet treat – iced B-52s and chocolate mousse cake!

We then headed back to the T and made it safely back to our hotel where we hit up the bar for one last drink before calling it a night.  After a fantastic nights sleep ::wink, wink:: we rolled out of the king sized bed at 11am!!  We packed up our things, checked out of the hotel, and requested our car from the valet.  But in true Bostonian fashion, we didn’t leave without grabbing breakfast first.  Where else but Dunkin’ Donuts!

Where were the girls you might ask?  They were home with Mimi who took fabulous care of them while we went out and pretended they didn’t exist.  They were beyond spoiled and loved.  And when we got home, Brinley was not happy.  She kept asking for us to leave.  I’m wondering if the bag of chocolate munchkins left on the counter had anything to do with that?!

We’ve all had these days, right?

You know those days when you just don’t feel like looking anyone in the face?  The days you just want to either lay in bed and do nothing or sit on the couch and watch crap on TV while you eat junk?  The days you just have no motivation to do anything?  The days that you call in sick to work even though you’re really not sick, you just can’t imagine going?  You decide to take a sick day for “mental health” reasons and then just spend the day vegging out at home.  Alone.  We’ve all had these days, right?

Well, I think that the hardest part about being a stay-at-home-mom is that fact that I can’t do that.  I can’t call in sick and just veg out on the couch on the days that I just don’t feel like seeing anyone or doing anything.  My bosses count on me to show up every day and fulfill all of my duties.  Their lives depend on me. I have to get out of bed.  I have to make breakfast.  I have to change diapers.  I have to play dress up.  I have to color.  I have to clean up spills.  Even if I don’t want to.

Once in a while I want to be sitting on my couch with my feet up in the middle of the day without having to prepare someone’s lunch or read someone a story.  Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t change being a stay-at-home-mom for anything in the world, but I still have those days. And I know I’m not alone.

So what’s a busy, stressed out, tired mom to do on a days like these?

Something that helps me get out of bed on such mornings is taking a minute to think about why I have to.  My children need me.  I’m their mother and that means I can’t call in sick.  No matter how tired or lazy I am feeling, I can’t let them feel the brunt of it.  They need me and that’s a very empowering thing.  So I get up and (try to) put a smile on my face and start the day.  Usually on a day like this I’ll try to do something extra fun like go to a park, or the library, or take the girls out to lunch.  It brings me joy to see them happy and having fun and sometimes that is all I need to brighten up my day!

Killing two birds and something I learned.

I’ve always been somewhat of a book worm.  However, the volume of books that I read has drastically declined since the birth of my kids.  I simply don’t have enough time in my day to read.  I miss snuggling up on the couch with a good book while  Scott watches {insert the name of any meaningless man show here}.  There was a time that I could easily finish 2 or 3 novels in a week.  Aaah, how I miss those days.

Anyway, during a recent trip to BJ’s I was browsing through the books (mainly to look at kids stuff) and came across a few that caught my eye.  I made note of the titles and then requested them at my library.  When I was notified that they were in, I became anxious to find the time to read again.  But how was I going to make time in my day to do this?  Well, I decided that I’d kill two birds with one stone, so to speak.  I’ve been trying to make time in the day to get back into working out (which has fallen off my planner since around Christmas time, eek!).  So now, a few nights each week, I go down and get on the treadmill and instead of listening to my iPod or watching TV, I open a book.  Last night while I was walking and reading, Scott came down and tried to talk to me.  I shooed him away declaring this “alone time” for me.

The book that I’m currently reading is Between Here and April by Deborah Copaken Kogan.  I saw it that day in BJ’s and it looked like a good, quick, easy read.  I’m pretty drawn to stories about mothers, children, families, etc.  Here is a brief synopsis of the book taken from the book jacket:

When a deep-seated memory suddenly surfaces, Elizabeth Burns becomes obsessed with the long-ago disappearance of her childhood friend April Cassidy. Driven to investigate, Elizabeth discovers a thirty-five-year-old newspaper article revealing the details that had been hidden from her as a child—shocking revelations about April’s mother, Adele.

Elizabeth, now herself a mother, seeks out anyone who might help piece together the final months, days, and hours of this troubled woman’s life, but the answers yield only more questions. And those questions lead back to Elizabeth’s own life: her own compromised marriage, her increasing self-doubt and dissatisfaction, and finally, a fearsome reckoning with what it means to be a wife and mother.

I’m not going to attempt to write a book review here as I’m only half way through the book.  However, as I was reading last night I came across a shocking fact. (Yes, this is a book of fiction but after reading this “fact” I was compelled to look it up to see if it were actually true, and it is!)  This might be common knowledge to some, but I had no idea and was pretty surprised by it.

Did you know that Postpartum Depression was not recognized as a mental illness by the legal system until 1994?  A main theme in this book is PPD and it just amazed me to see how this was handled in the late 1960s and early 1970s. PPD isn’t something that was really on my radar until I was pregnant with my first child but even when I first became aware of it, I never would have imagined that the thoughts, feelings and emotions that some women go through after childbirth would have been completely discounted as recently as the 70s.

I’m anxious to finish the book to find out what happens.  It’s not really an engrossing read thus far, but it’s not something that I’m ready to abandon half way through either.  I’ll keep you posted!

How did this happen?

Who took away my baby and replaced her with this child??

She doesn’t look like a baby anymore! :-(  I can not believe how big she looks.  She’s walking all over the place, eating “real” food and just growing so much.  I feel like the past 10 and a half months have gone by so fast.  I feel like I was just in the hospital having her.  This is just craziness!

Oh and what about this one??

She has somehow transformed from my baby girl into this “kid”.  I have no idea how it happened.  Just last night Scott and I were looking at pictures of her first days of preschool this year, from September.  She looked like such a little baby in those pictures.  Since then she has completely lost her little baby face.  I can’t believe she is already three and a half (and she acts much older, most of the time).

It’s been quite a ride watching these two grow and I wouldn’t change it for the world.  I’m really sad that the baby days are behind us, but I’m extremely excited for what the future has to bring for both of them.

Waking up is hard to do.

Why is it so hard for me to wake up in the morning?  It’s not like 6:30am is really even that early.  In my past life, when I was working outside of the home, I was up much earlier than that.  In fact, most mornings I was at work by 7am after a forty-five minute to an hour commute.  That means I was getting up at about 5:30ish. I can’t even fathom getting out of bed that early these days.  But why is waking up so freakin’ hard?  It’s not due to lack of sleep.  I am usually in bed by 11pm which means that I’m averaging about seven and a half hours of sleep per night.  That’s more than most people I know.

The only logical answer to why I have such a hard time getting out of the bed in the morning is… (drum roll please)… KIDS!  Specifically, my own kids.  Because, in my past life, I was also facing kids every day.  I was a teacher.  It’s different now though.  When I was teaching and didn’t have my own offspring, I could still ease into my morning.  I could stumble to the shower still half asleep while the warm water slowly woke me up (or made me more tired).  I could get dressed, eyes half opened (as long as I had picked out my outfit the night before), and head to the kitchen for some coffee and a bowl of cereal – all at my own pace (well as long as I made it to work on time).

What’s different now is that there is no easing into the morning.  When I wake up at 6:30am now, it’s usually to the sound of a baby babbling (though often times she’s fussing because I’ve left her in the crib past her happy babbling period).  There is no warm shower to greet me and slowly wake me up.  Instead it’s a bright eyed baby girl who wants to eat… NOW!  So at 6:34am, I’m still in my pajamas, eyes still more than half shut, 17lb baby in hand, shuffling down the stairs, fumbling to get my baby girl some food.  During this time I’m usually greeted by a the well rested, high pitched voice of my three and a half year old.  She is more than ready to start the day but I have still not had my coffee, damn it!

Don’t get me wrong, I love my girls more than life itself.  I just miss being able to ease into the day.  Like I said, it’s not about getting enough sleep, because I feel like I do.  It’s about having to begin a mother’s work without having had a cup of coffee first!

I would gladly award a prize to anyone who can come up with a way to remedy this situation.  And please do not suggest that I get up earlier than said kids so that I can have my coffee before they are rearing to go.  I’m just not willing to do that.

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